Saturday, May 10, 2008

不吐不快!

讨厌喜怒无常的你,
讨厌失去自我的我,
更讨厌什么也办不了,畏首畏尾的自己!
不知道从什么时候开始,我变得如此怯弱!
是的,怯弱!!
好听些或对其他人来说,那叫忍让,潇洒,成熟,不斤斤计较~
内心深处,这对我来说,是一种自辱,胆小怕事!
处处迎合别人,刻刻察言观色。。想停止这些无谓的动作,可后果将会是什么?!
你给了我希望--我可以停止做我不想做的事情~
可是,这希望是否已在破灭着?!
应该相信你吗?
可是我似乎还没有找到你说过的任何一句活是坚持到最后的~~
你说你喜欢我不拘小节,有话直说的性格,
我是应该天真的相信你,还是只把它当作是礼貌的称赞?!

迷惑迷惑。。。言行为何不一致?!?!!

我已经渐渐付出我的真心。。我也希望我可以继续付出。。
可是你能让我继续吗??~

--May--

3 gimme more:

Sue-zy said...

yea, i totally agree with you. it's really hard to have this kind of friend, if you even call this friend? but you used to tell me (in my previous sms), there is no need to use 真心 to treat these people. for me, they will only add misery in your life! so why not 潇洒 and just let it go? usually i won't waste any more of my precious time to try hard and nurture this friendship which is not longer there...

i've sooo many experiences where i feel that i'm the ONLY one who put in hella effort in maintaning the friendship, but sadly he/she just won't freaking appreciate it!

after all, friends are suppose to share your joy and sadness, who never walk out on you, who always be there for you when you need it the most, they are not suppose to be one of your BURDEN and make your life miserable....isn't it?

no matter what, please remember you still have us! =)

May said...

ya...but somehow i need someone here...the person is not like bastard~~that's why i din't put an equal sign for it..i won't treat the person as the way i will treat the bastard if the bastard is here...
this is somehow more difficult to me...if the person is bastard,everything is simple! but the problem is..the person is nice..!!or maybe we are just not the same kind of people...i will never know where i stand for the person forever though!
well..i called the person as friend as the person at least fullfil the first rule..maybe im too sensitive,too emotional or maybe i haven't reach the level to talk about those rules with the person?i don't know...but i think she does treat me as friend..is just the matter of which type of friend only......it was just that i don't know how to nurture the relationship..
i knew the way we define friend is totally different..i am just trying to minimize the differences but i wondered whether the person knows?
and, ha! appreciation...
sue,i don't see ppl here appreciate ' relationship'..i mean i think they never realized how precious a relationship can be...

reading the last sentence in the midnight make me put on a smile and feel the warmness inside my heart!...wah so nice...

anyway...my problem is just a small one!im headache as the way i make friends is different from the ppl here only...sometimes very fan don't know how to communicate!but the ppl here are very nice and friendly,helpful...won't treat you invisible...so...i shall jia you!!
perhaps i will have xing ge fen lie zheng...as til now, the way i behave among friends of chunghwa,inti is different from University!haiz...what to do?
tak kan ask all of them to ying he you?!....:S

May

Anonymous said...

cheer up!! I'll always be there for you!!